Michelle Manjarrez, life long educator, natural healer, and bridge from information to understanding
When I found out that my mom was diagnosed with cancer it was, oddly, through a report I got in the mail. I was living in the US at the time and immediately I packed my bags and went back to Mexico to be with her.
It was terrible. There was a huge amount of fear.
The very next day, we went to the hospital. The doctor showed me the tumor and we had no idea how to deal with what was to come. You just don't, until you go through it. My mom was hospitalized for 5 months after that.
It has been an incredible journey, a totally new experience - a lot of unknown.
I felt helpless and powerless at that point because she was misdiagnosed, had sepsis and almost died, and there was a lot of miscommunication within the hospital envrionment. We were NOT feeling supported.
I made a decision and changed her from one hospital to another hospital. Through education, and me being an academic, I found my power coming back.
"Big guys in white robes" or, doctors, would come tell me one thing while my research was telling me something different.
I kept feeling a sense of intense doom until I became educated. It was then that I became a true advocate. It was then that I became empowered.
Then, the journey to recovery started. From there we became team players with the doctors. They recognized that there wasnt anything they could tell me that I couldn't learn to undertstand...
"What are three ways you calmed yourself in the face of ACTUAL death?"
I don't mean it in a commercial way - I mean it in more of a "sitting quietly on my own" way.
I would do that constantly.
In the first hospital there was garden where I could sit quietly and breathe. Sometimes it felt like all I could do to stay sane!
So you could do breath techniques but also sitting in nature queitly with myself was so helpful.
Nature is big. I had left the comforts of my own home and environment. Now I was in a new country, hospital....everything was new. To have my 'own space' I needed to find nature - in Mexico City!
So i found it. I was constantly scanning for nature and when I found it I took my time with it.
"You cannot make a choice if you don't know it exists."
I must say that hitting the books - making the unknown know was incredibly helpful.
Really getting deep into information - first basic information - then chats and blogs - then the more detailed information - it would distract my mind from the "monkey brain" - in those instances the monkey brain was worry about whether or not the doctors were doing the right thing.
There was a point where we had to make a huge and vital decision for my mom about a stem cell transplant - at that point - her being so sick, this option would give her time.
People can get really hurt the stem cell transplant process though - so it felt like a high risk situation. In my case I felt a LOT of responsibility.
I was asking myself, "Am I strong enough? - What if?"
There were lots of options. All the details connecting the insurance to the doctors. I found the more I could learn, the more confident I felt in my decision making.
You cannot make a choice if you don't know it exists.
3. Energy healing
I Believe that energy healing works in every way - reiki - self energy healing -
To do this I go into the core of my center of my body and get out of my mind.
I use mantras or music, which helps me get into that space where I can bring healing to what needs healing.
I am am so pleased to say that mom is stable and now living an independent life once again.
Michelle Manjarrez now leads retreats for cancer patients who can experiment with 18 different healing modalities. Based in all of Michelle's research, LifeTribe is designed to expose patients to many different options so they can find what really works for them- the next retreat is coming up soon! Click here to learn more about life tribe.
Expert's Panel with Joe Minock - Startup Developer and Coach at Athlete Progress - How to Ride The Entrepreneurial Rollercoaster without Losing Your Pants
I went out and got the best of the best for you.
I spoke with experts, doctors, and spiritual teachers.
I asked these high achievers about their fears and how they move through them to live the life they love.
In March of 2015 I woke up and thought I was having a heart attack.
It wasnt the first time I had been anxious, but it was definitely the worst.
My heart felt like it was blasting through my chest. I couldn't breathe, and couldn't get my breathing under control. Couldn't get my heart rate under control.
When I was finally able to settle down I vented to my girlfriend about everything that was going on. She was a saint. She helped me through the roughest time in my life....
"I was basically allowing myself to be abused. Carrying a massive workload and seeing no reward for it..."
'I had built our company, sold to all of our clients, built the product....
But I felt the team wasn't focused. I didn't think they were going after the right type of clients. They were doing their job, but not in a way that as focused and I couldn't seem to get it under control.
We knew a certain kind of client would be best, and I was basically allowing myself to be abused. Carrying a massive workload and seeing no reward for it.
I always have had a please everyone' type of attitude.
go go go. do do do.
Always say yes.
I had not set any boundaries or set any limits to what I was going to do. So in doing that I lost all control over my life and. business
I set myself up for failure.
What are 3 ways you help yourself back to calm?
1. Say no.
"How do you discern what to say no to?" I asked.
This comes from a blog post or Tim Ferris podcast with Derek Sivers ((One of my personal heros - Derek are you single?!)).
I ask myself, can I say "Fuck yea" to what ever I am entering in to and and totally get behind it?
If not, I have to say no.
Is it something that I am going to love?
Or something that just seems like a ton of work with no reward?
If I need to say no, I try to find an eloquent way of doing it.
If i cant find an eloquent way, I just say no!
For instance right now, normally when someone asks me to do something in coffee shop like you are doing, I say no! ((See, I AM special!))
2. As humans we are great at knowing WHAT we want to do, but not HOW to do it.
If I cant define HOW I am going to do something I don't give it any of my time or focus until I can define how to approach it.
When I do this, I don't get stressed out over things I cant control.
Yet, if something is in a nebulous state I can't influence it - You can only control and plan for what you know.
This allows me to keep ideas in idea phase until I can exercise actual influence.
((The unknown is one of the scariest edges for us all. We will always face unknown, and the more we can let go, the more creative that space can be. If you can sit in the unknown without filling the space, you can allow yourself to be supported by your faith and the mighty universe)).
3. Have a plan - write sh!t down
I have a heat sensitive note pad that you can erase with heat and water in the microwave! It's called a Rocket book. I use it to create form from the fog.
Start with what you know. I use a system that comes from Jason Freed and David Heinemeier Hansson (the creators of base camp).
It's a simple system that uses orders of understanding. You match the size of your writing utensil to how much you know.
The more you know, the smaller the utensil you can use and really fill in the details. Start with the broad strokes. I like to use a marker board and go from there.
It was a total a-ha for me because I am detail oriented to a fault and I need to see the big picture AND the details. This way I can start to organize my ideas in order of magnitude and add in the details under the larger headings.
Joe Minock is Startup Developer and Coach at Athlete Progress. He is a man of many talents including furniture building. Twitter is the best way to reach Joe. Or, email him at firstname.lastname@example.org - you know he'll only get back to you if it's a FUCK YES so take the risk and reach out if he inspires you~ even if it is just to say THANK-YOU.
Compassion + Integrity = Powerful Leadership - What's your vision for the world?